Jaci Dawn

Just thinking about things and letting my mind settle. Sometimes I have to do that.

I like to mull things over.

When Arwen was a toddler, I occasionally tried leaving her at some Day Care or another. She always sat on the outside and observed. She wasn’t one for jumping in to the situation. She wasn’t afraid of it and she never, ever cried when I left her, but she mulled over the situation before getting involved.

Levi, on the other hand, screamed and wept and dramatically threw himself at my feet when I tried to leave him in the church nursery.

I am a lot like Arwen in the need to sit and mull it over awhile before taking action. But eventually, I do take action.

There’s a lot going on in my head. Not so much in my life, but a lot in my head. So I am sitting back and mulling it over.

And working through the dreams that come when I am getting ready to face something in my life.

So – night before last, I dreamed of a plague of frogs. Tiny baby frogs just new from being tadpoles. Some little kid was catching them and putting them into little canvas bags. One escaped and got into the bed and someone stepped on it. UGH. I tried to catch some frogs but they were hopping into the swimming pool and the swimming pool was filled with brightly colored exotic sea creatures like sea-spiders and other poisonous creatures that can also climb up onto the land. Oh, and there were slugs marching toward the pool with the frogs. Only the slugs were much slower.

Last night I dreamed I was a teenager and the alarm went off. I had to hurry and get ready for school because for the first time ever I was going to ride the bus. I had to compete with several older sisters for the mirror in the bathroom so I could put my make-up on. I was determined that no matter how terrified I was of the new situation (school and bus) and no matter how terrible I am at putting on make-up, I was going to face this new situation head-on. I was going to bluff my way through.

Frogs? Make-up? Freud or Jung?

Sometimes my dreams are just fodder for short stories. They don’t mean anything, they’re just good fiction.

I feel guilty that I am not blogging as often as I should but right now life has a ”
sit-back-and-mull-it-over” feel to it. Frogs in dreams excluded.

At least I wasn’t naked and going to school in the other dream. I was dressed and putting on make-up.

I don’t even wear make-up beyond a little eye shadow and blush.

I’m pretty certain there are deep meanings to all of this.

I don’t like stepping on little frogs and I really do not like the idea of things sharing the swimming pool with me. That’s why God created chlorine.

Digressing: when I was a pre-teen, we spent many many days at the public swimming pool in Winnemucca. We got monthly passes and swam nearly every day. One time we were there at closing time and they kicked us all out. As we dried off and dressed in our little chlorine-smelling dressing rooms painted pale blue, a voice called out. “Hurry up and change!”

My best friend replied loudly, “Into what?”

There was a dead silence before the life guard got the joke.

I think I am waiting to decide what I am changing into. I hope it isn’t a frog or a make-up obsessed teenager. Wonder which one is worse?